Shameless feathers


You died in me on a windy day. And the shameless within that hour when I detached from you, became the crazy insanity with which your breeze snatches me.

I became a person of easy gestures (however impossible they may seem to me) and difficult words, even if they run from my fingers with the easiness of a soft wine.

I suffer from early saciation of your absence since I met you. I don’t know what to say to you, maybe deep inside I always knew you wouldn’t last me. But you’ve been lasting this infinite feeling that unsettles me, even when it’s the only light in my darkness.

I ran away from me because I can’t run away from you. And that’s how I found myself here, old in Prague, feeding birds that, with me, carry the enduring feathers of this nameless affection I have for you.

***

Morreste-me num dia de vento. E o despudor com que, nessa hora, me desprendi de ti, tornou-se na insensatez louca com que as tuas brisas me arrebatam.

Tornei-me numa pessoa de gestos fáceis (por impossíveis que me pareçam) e palavras difíceis, ainda que me escorram dos dedos com a facilidade de um vinho maduro.

Sofro da saciedade precoce da tua ausência desde o dia em que te conheci. Não sei o que te diga, se calhar no fundo nunca acreditei que me durasses. Mas tens-me durado este sentimento infinito que me desassossega, mesmo quando é a única luz na minha escuridão.

Fujo de mim porque não sei fugir de ti. E foi assim que me encontrei aqui, velha em Praga, a dar de comer a pássaros que, comigo, carregam as penas deste gostar-te a que não se dar nome.

 

 

 

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